Sneaky wife

Bob: While you're in the kitchen, can you bring me my nerds?

Me: Sure.

Bob: BOTH packages (assuming I'll steal one).

Me: Sure.

Bob: UNOPENED (assuming I'll bring him both but open one and eat a few).

Me: Sure.

Bob: ........ Ok, what's the catch?

Me: Nothing.

Bob: You're being completely honest?

Me: Yup.

I come back in, toss the packages at him, both of them unopened. I'm smirking.

Bob: .... what's the catch?

Me: Nothing.

(silence.....)

Bob: You opened my Skittles and took some didn't you?

Me: Yup.

Bob: Bailey (the golden retriever, the kindest beast in the world, 90% asleep under his feet), bite her in the butt.