Breakdown.

Last night I had a bit of a breakdown. There were several reasons.

1. Paddington had a bad vet visit. Ok, he's not sick, but he has two sore teeth. The vet says we dont' have to pull them yet (he doesn't need them- they're his back two teeth), but oh, he shook when she pressed down on him. And then, to make matters worse, she told me that he's probably older than we initially thought; maybe as old as 10. NO! My boy. My poor boy. He followed me around last night and finally collapsed, asleep, next to the space heater near me. Then, when I went to bed, he was on the bed and put his paw on my hand, as if to say all will be ok. Heartstrings tugged.

2. Work. I've been working like crazy. Part of it is learning time, so I can't really get credit for those, so I have to work even harder. I brought work home every night this week, intending to work on it, but instead getting swept up in...

3. Invitations. Still not done.

4. Mess mess mess. The apartment is a mess. SO is my car. Laundry needs to be done, dishes too, vacuuming, etc.


I was supposed to go down to see B this weekend, but he's coming up here instead because I just can't come back to such a mess.

So last night I sat on the couch. MESS MESS MESS all around me. Paddington konked out in front of the heater (but I was sad about his visit). Invites not done. Mess mess mess. And I had a 4-5 hour project to do before 10am this morning for work. And I was supposed to pack up some of B's stuff for his new apartment. And pack up my weekend stuff. And ready the cats for me being gone. And pack up weddign stuff to work on this weekend.

I got home at 8pm with Paddington, and I just couldn't do anything. TOO MUCH, and I knew nothing woudl be done entirely. And I'm tired of things not being done entirely.

I'm better today. B's coming home. We'll get the place cleaned up and all invites done. We'll work on other projects. It will be ok.

And right now I'm happier... typing this post and eating my lettuce, turkey bits, egg whites, and tofu salad. Delish.

And I met my deadline at 10am.